John entered his second marriage at 38, with a painful secret. He was $25,000 in credit card debt. He always meant to tell Susan, but could never find the courage. John was deeply ashamed both of the $25,000 debt itself (it was consumer debt) and even more that he hadn’t told Susan.
Five years into the marriage, he was pretty sure Susan suspected (after all, a few hundred dollars a month didn’t make it off his paycheque into the family budget, but mysteriously ‘disappeared’ each month), but still didn’t feel ready to discuss it.