I have an earthy question. What etiquette should we follow when we donating our clothes to charitable organizations?

My professional organizing friend, Linda Chu, spent Saturday with me informing me that 75% of my wardrobe needed to go. (I think about money. I think about politics. Fashion and clothing? not so much). Thank goodness for Linda, who tossed and sorted with me for two hours. Then I packed up the piles we’d put on my bed labelled “Be Gone!” but it raised some issues for me.

1. If it’s no longer ‘good enough’ for me, why is it ‘good enough’ for someone of lower economic status? They were quality pieces, to be sure, but a little outdated (or as Linda pointed out, “ummmm…look at how droopy those pockets are getting, Nancy.” Droopy pockets? Droopy pockets? I never thought to consider such a thing.) The truly awful (the ones even I could recognize were bad) went in the garbage. But still. Even if it is Ann Klein, should someone else be the recipient of droopy pockets or last year’s fashion?
2. And drycleaning. A lot of the pieces could have used a trip to the drycleaners … but it would have cost about $200 if I’d done them all. They weren’t thaaaaat bad, and I’m assuming (?) that the thrift store will give all their outfits a once-over? Anyone know? What’s the etiquette on this?

This week I spent some time with clients who are facing their finances straight on. While they are very courageous and ultimately will experience good results, they – like many clients – are experiencing significant anxiety and grasping for solutions.

Seeing the clear picture and experiencing a high level of anxiety can lead to drastic thoughts like:

• I must sell my house
• I must move back in with my family
• I must withdraw from my retirement funds (if they exist)

Feeling like we must do something usually only heightens the intensity and negative emotions about the situation. It squelches our ability to come up with workable solutions.

A much more productive and appropriate response is to ground ourselves in the certainty that we have options.

Then, we need to flesh out what those options are.

There is always a spectrum of possible responses to any given situation. What are the various points on the spectrum and which ones could we live with?